Thursday, November 04, 2010

As You Like It

I have to admit to getting just a bit verklempt while reading this:

Then as we got closer to the actual day, he stared to hem and haw about it. After some discussion it comes out that he is afraid people will laugh at him. I pointed out that some people will because it is a cute and clever costume. He insists their laughter would be of the ‘making fun’ kind. I blow it off. Seriously, who would make fun of a child in costume?

...If you think that me allowing my son to be a female character for Halloween is somehow going to ‘make’ him gay then you are an idiot. Firstly, what a ridiculous concept. Secondly, if my son is gay, OK. I will love him no less. Thirdly, I am not worried that your son will grow up to be an actual ninja so back off.

...I hate that my son had to learn this lesson while standing in front of allegedly Christian women. I hate that those women thought those thoughts, and worse felt comfortable saying them out loud. I hate that ‘pink’ is still called a girl color and that my baby has to be so brave if he wants to be Daphne for Halloween.

I had totally forgotten about it, but this reminded me that my mom still has pictures somewhere of me dressing up in some of her clothes when I was probably four or five -- hats, wigs, jewelery, coats, shawls, heels, you name it. I painted my nails more than a few times, and I used to play around with the rest of her makeup too. You know why? Because it was fun. Men's and boy's clothes are frequently just boring as hell. Nowadays I'm too lazy to dress for anything but comfort, but I can still harbor an sneaking admiration for dandyism, foppishness and general sartorial creativity.

Anyway, I'm grateful that I was never made to feel like there was anything wrong with it, even when I went through my gender-bending rock musician phase in my teens. Thanks, mom.


  1. I liked the comment that if the daughter wanted to dress up like batman, no one would have said anything.

    I knew a boy in highschool who wore floor-length or ankle-length skirts because he said "they were more comfortable than pants" (Something for you to try, Scribbles?) That was the most political statement about them that he ever made. And if he had other reasons for doing it, he never shared them with me.

    But I wouldn't think they were TOTALLY apolitical statements, because he did escort his gf at her grad in a long black skirt. But really, how could you resist tweaking noses like that?

    It would take a stronger man than I....

  2. I'd rock a kimono or sarong.

  3. Sarongs and kimonos are technically dresses, since they are once piece. Keegan wore skirts, long, a-line things that went on forever, because he was tall.

    However, I don believe you could rock a kimono or a sarong.

  4. Sorry! that was a typo. I DO believe you could etc, etc. I'll ship you one if you wear it to your mom's for Thanksgiving!

  5. My best friend dressed me up in her mom's clothes when I was 5 - dress, jewelry, heels. We thought it was a hoot. We went next door to show me off and when our nice, big haired neighbor lady saw me, she said, "Does your mama know you're dressed like that?" (She didn't). No one was mean about it, but I got the idea that it was taboo.
    I think it's ironic that most men are so afraid of being accused of being effeminate. Being afraid is not exactly considered manly in other contexts. When my sister told her friend that her brother could sew, her friend said, "Is he gay?". I guess that's what did it!

  6. I plan to come down with a nasty 48 hour virus around Tuesday or Wednesday of that week, so I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to make use of it for the holiday.

    I think it's ironic that most men are so afraid of being accused of being effeminate. Being afraid is not exactly considered manly in other contexts.

    Good point. You'd think, just for appearance's sake, they'd want to affect a more nonchalant sangfroid about it. He doth protest too much and all that.